LEAVING YESTERDAY
Wenyao

There are some things in life we have no control over, and that's what destiny is.
Thursday, November 10, 2011, 6:43:00 PM
Still Fighting.

What doesn't kill me makes me stronger. That's what she told me.

I think we must be determined. Life is not supposed to be easy to begin with. If we know this is the way, we should fight for it. The road may be tough and full of obstacles, but you will never know how strong we really are till being strong is the only way out.

Sometimes in the late nights, I ask myself what am I doing this for? I ask myself why did I choose audit despite the poor pay and long working hours? But I know that at a certain point of my life, this path was exactly what I chose. I don't want to be someone who says one thing and do another.

I told myself, I'll work hard if I am given another chance. Now that I'm given a second one, why am I thinking about giving up?

I have nice seniors who sacrifice their time to teach me. But sometimes I don't understand why there's a need to be so hard on rules. Oh well, maybe someday I will understand.

Back to her, she's a nice and pretty girl. Fits perfectly into what my ideal soul mate will be. But we all know that sometimes thing don't end up with what we really want to be. Not that I'm giving up, but if this is one sided to begin with. I don't see the point anymore.

I think I should let nature take its course. If we are meant to be, we will be. I don't know what I did for her was even suffice. But I think talking to the wall will not get you any kind of response.

I'll just try and make her happy and probably make myself happy too. Impatience is my bane. I am always too eager for results that I keep forgetting that sometimes the timing is not right. Maybe I'm just weak minded. I don't know. I also can't understand if I don't even understand or know what I want, how do people claim that they understand me?

I do ponder a lot.

Do I really need to put in more effort? On the other hand, I don't want to pressure her. Well, I think I can give you space. But please let me know.

Exams are coming. I'm not prepared. But I suppose I will be able to handle this. It's a Thursday. Tomorrow will be Friday. Then a weekend. Then back to Monday.