LEAVING YESTERDAY
Wenyao

There are some things in life we have no control over, and that's what destiny is.
Monday, August 15, 2011, 11:11:00 PM
Trite

Days went by. Did things get better? I don't really know anymore. Well, the great thing is that time passes fast. Real fast.

Many events happened. None to be really glad about. I gradually adapted to the current pace of life. I began to start taking more steps. Dieting came into place. Exercise became some kind of usual activity.

Not that I'd seen myself change for the better. But I know that I can't continue like this anymore. I hate it when people ask me why do I go on diet. Well, just because some guys don't care about how they look, doesn't mean that I can't be a little more vain than the rest. Yeah, I am on diet. I want to look good. Deal with it. That's me.

Friendships form, while others start to grew apart. Well, you can't possibly have the best of all worlds. I got over the fact that I might not be the important person of your life. But I just don't want to get forgotten and left behind. I might not be the best, but as long as I try to be a little better everyday, it is enough. Maybe enough for me.

I start to feel this fatigue. Not only in the mind, but on my body. I've been hitting myself a little more, a little out of my comfort zone. Does it pay off? I don't know. There are a lot of mysteries I am currently facing.

I tried to be perfect, but I realised it is not worth it. A lot of times, I start to suspect in myself. Other times, I don't know what else I can say. I mean, I only hope you feel better. I know where I stand, but sometimes, I wish I knew where the problem was.

It is frustrating when you know that there is a problem and you can't have the solution. I guess I knew it all along that no matter how hard I tried, I could never change the position of myself in your mind.

I can't say I am not bothered by this, because I am.

I was thinking, one day, one fine day, when I need help, who will be there? All these 'friendships' that I had yield over these time, were they worth the time? So, who will be there for me?

I don't know. I don't want to probe further. Every man for himself. So do friends actually exists?

I take a lot of people as friends, but whether they do vice versa, I am not very sure of that.

And if everyone doesn't like you, you are the problem.

p.s. Get on my nerve, and I will bite. And I bite hard.