I think I am too greedy. Sometimes I can no longer tell what do I really want or what do I need. Everything is like a need for me now, nothing that I do is something I like. Well, I suppose its another whining session.

I think I have a broken right shoulder already, after lifting those weights and such. Or maybe not to broken yet, but it hurts. I am afraid. I fear that I can no longer work out anymore. I fear that I will become who I was, but I didn't change much since like a few years ago anyways.

Every morning, I wake up with body aches. Sometimes even cramps in the legs in the middle of the night. I cannot even get up from my bed without rolling down, I am dead serious. Well, who understands my plight?

All that I had done, what were they for? Seems pointless to me at some point of my life.

Change needs to come, but it is too slow. Too damn slow for my liking.

Every night I look at the sky, I asked myself what had I done for the day. Some people call this 'emo', I call this time alone. Sometimes, I could think of something that I'd done for the day. That will make me delirious and reach for my pillows earlier. But there were other nights where I could not think of anything.

Much of what I'd done had been futile. A lot of times, I feel so alone.

I know this blog is boring without pictures or what-so-ever. But this is my life. Live with it.