LEAVING YESTERDAY
Wenyao

There are some things in life we have no control over, and that's what destiny is.
Friday, March 6, 2009, 11:07:00 PM
If Only Life's A Game

Good Game


if life is a game, then mine is over. if only i can restart my life like what i do in my dota games. i dun seek to be the carrier to win the game. i just didnt want to lose; or rather dont feed. few rounds of dota led me thinking for quite a bit. well.. these few days are all full of dota. average of 8 games per day i suppose. this week my eyes had been rotating between computer screen, tv screen, gym weights and prolly the stadium track.


20 years. hmm.. that adds up to 7300 days. every day of that is kinda wasted. life's unfair? think again. if u had used this 20 years wisely, will life be fair? i have this mindset that hardwork is the key to success.. but is it really true? i dont know..


winning issnt everything, or rather i dont even aim to win. however, losing IS everything.. how i hope everything can come to a draw.. so many things are left unsaid, unthought of...


i dont know if its only me. sometime in life, ur thinkings tend to change. i used to be such a bastard.. everything was about me and me.. no surprise that this led to this ending now... everything i did was to my pleasure, and to my liking.. i dont do anything that i don't like.. things do change.. i realise i need to do things which i dont like too. coz these things will result in good endings..


for those who really dont know me, i dont like gym.. i also dont like to run.. i am one lazy faggot who dont wanna get out of bed.. i dont wanna go out, i just wanna stay at home and play my stupid virtual games.. kinda think of it, playing games is such a loser job.. so what if u win? u gain anything? no.. what u gain is mental satisfaction.. is that all you want, wenyao? i don't know.. but on the other hand. i do love to play games. i like to escape from the reality that im a cui guy and burying myself in the virtual world.. i dont know when i will wake up.. maybe i wont..


i did too many terrible things in the past.. i used to laugh at those who believe in retribution. now i think i am suffering from it.. give you 1 word to illustrate my life: Regret. i live my life in regret now. those 7300 days. everything that i do now, i am sure i will regret in the future. including spending time to type this shit now. i dont know why im doing this. maybe its just me.


heard of the song: Skater Boy by Avril? no nvm.. but try it out.. it is quite nice.. its a story about this punk guy who likes this girl from a rich family. however, the girl rejected him. in the end, the girl got married to a asshole and the punk became a rock star... this song tells you that dont judge when they are young.. my comments? bullshit. things dont turn out this way one. its just a song used to entice ppl into buying the album la.. u really think this world got fairy tale one ar? what from poor can suddenly become v zai, v rich? dun crap with me la..i think the song is nice, but the story is shit used to lie to people.


well, anyway, the reason for me to write all these issnt for me to gain what sympathy or what shit from others.. this is just a place for me to rant and write.. i dont even expect anyone to read this.. and if you there are reading this for dunno wadever reason, thanks a lot. =)